Are you normal?

 In the last events I’ve been going, I think I’m starting to recognize “quirky” people like me. I’m using “quirky” because I’m not really sure what it is. Maybe I can put it more clearly in the next paragraphs.

I feel tempted to use “neurodivergents” and “neurotypicals”, but I don’t see it like something (specifically, at least) related to the autism spectrum; also, I don’t know so much about it, even if I have explored my own possible neurodivergence. That said, I have the impression that some people act within some…, regular, controlled, “typical”, not deviating behavior; while some other people somehow stand out for the way they act or think. I know this could call trouble, but there’s people that you see or interact with, and you would say: they’re very normal people; and there’s those others—again, like me—that you would say: “there’s something odd in that person". How could I describe those quirky individuals? Let me see…

They have a peculiar way to express themselves. What they say, the way they say it, their body language; something calls your attention immediately. Sadly, I suspect they have suffered some abuse because of that, or at least have been teased for it.

They really speak their mind, or the opposite. This is something I’ve seen discussed in stuff about autism. Suddenly they say something that make you cringe or shock you. On the other hand, you feel like you’re trying to get a confession from a criminal when you talk to them.

They leave an impression. Someone could be pleasant in any way, have done or says interesting things, but somehow you get the full picture already. That’s OK, and we are lucky most of the people acts or at least looks that way. However, you won’t forget so easily a quirky one for a while. When the impression is a little intense, you either don’t want to meet that person ever again or you want more.

You may like them, but they probably won’t reciprocate. I’ll talk for myself here. I’ve met people really nice, some of them have offered their friendship, and I think of them with love. But…, I don’t know what to do or talk about with them. Also, I don’t feel comfortable expressing an emotion I’m not feeling at the moment. For example, I mostly hate to say “Happy birthday!”. I’m glad you are alive this year too, but it’s not like you were going to die, anyway; and if you did, that would be awkward. If it were a girlfriend or a very veeery close relative or friend, that would be different. Maybe.

They recognize each other. Well, that’s what I think. Maybe everyone recognize them! Should I better say: they identify with each other?

I’ve been obsessed with my “rarity” for a long time. What is it? Parents from different nationalities? A personality disorder? Too much time on my own? Neurodivergent? INFJ? Or I’m just a normal guy like everyone else, just thinking that I’m weird, like everyone else. Whatever it is, I feel hope believing there are more like me.